If I do suffer cardiac arrest to the point it will become unbearable I will be most likely gone for good

There will be no hospital and even if hospital, I will not survive 100% not. Mark "NOT" with guarantee. 

If not dead inside than outside - once out...

My life became a joke...a game for designated maniacs. Is completely disregarded and as such doesn't hold any value to me alone any longer. Last thing in this nightmare I need and what psychiatrists in Slovenia have threatened me with under MKultra will be https://www.google.com/man wakes up from comma and speaks new language joke

I know I have displayed publicly affection for mentioned psychologist, but I truly never ever want to see her again. 

What have you come to Grotniki for other than to trigger this !!????